Madame Cassava McGroo
c/o Madame McGroo’s Seltzer Spa
Rt. 2, Box 36 A Pozo Road
New Fenwick

Madam McGroo, how DO you do?

Your clinic came to my attention with the HIGHEST recommendation. Word amongst gentlemen of NOTE is that you are both a “Miracle Worker” and discreet. I count on that discretion when I tell you that I am in DIRE need of R&R (Rest and Relaxation). What started as a perfectly normal week, with talk of picnics and grand adventure! has gone sour in the Worst Way. I tell you, I am at my WIT’S ENDS!

Madam McGroo, I would throw myself at the mercy of your restorative tonics at your Earliest convenience. I want The Works. Spare no expense– my pockets are many and deep. I am new to this sort of thing, so if there is anything I should bring—a spare hat or gifts for the serving staff—please DO advise!

Discreetly yours,
Gatsby